Fat Lady Has Started The Intro

Ok I still have to wear a coat outside and am developing another bloody cold but the end is nigh (the end of the cold weather that is) and as spring approaches and winter fades away some things don't change. But some things will.

I told the family that I shall be leaving them early July, they took it OK although I could see that J was moved, I know that it's early days but I wanted them to be prepared to look for someone else. J said that she wan't sure whether she could do the experience again and that it is too difficult for the children. Funny, as an au pair now, I know that I couldn't have different people coming in and out of my children's life, she is worried about breaking the news to Frederic. They did suggest that I wait for him to grow up and then I would be allowed to leave. I declined.

My Korean friend has taken to calling me mum, he is such an idiot, I am so glad I met him, we are like brother and sister. He is insane like me and gives wicked massages that I bully him into performing, he is after every and any girl in a skirt but is harmless. We are planning a trip to a town called Orange, sounds like a strange strange place.

J and JP are like puppies in mating season, I would be disgusted but I find them too cute, their love is still strong and even when they snap at each other they use "'mon amour' you're wrong."

I am still happy, still meeting people and still far king single. I'm liking it at the moment though, it's kinda fun, I can play the flirting game without hurting people's feelings even if nothing does come of it.

La vie est belle!

I have been offered to have a night of leisure, a guy wants to wait on me hand and foot, I'll just not let him get too close to my feet, I haven't had a pedi since december!

Getting Up

Falling is easy, getting up is the hard part, am up and at them.
I am in a strange mood, I think that when I fell down the stairs some of my brain cells must have been jolted!

One week with the kids full time and I think I deserve a medal, a cash prize. a cookie? And will my prince in shining armour arrive sometime soon, this is getting loooooonnnnnnnnnnnngggg.

Rugby guy is making me laugh, I never knew Georgian's had game. He is now currently facebook stalking my photos and has invited me to some national football matches. Oh wait the stalking aint game but kudos for top seats at matches. I made it clear that if I went it would be just as a friend, I kinda wish I fancied him at least then I might have something to do.

I look a hot mess so I actually don't know why he is interested anyway, ok my hair is a mess, body is banging...or bangable (oops let's stay PG 13).

I understand those who say my children are my life, my children are literally my life. Nothing to do, so bored!
I'm meeting the shot sipper for coffee tomorrow, should be a laugh...again, why don't I fancy him, he is decent enough right? Oh no, he sips shots! I wonder if he is going to sip his expresso tomorrow?

Instead I kinda think my HD is kinda cute. lol! But I know why I don't like anybody......

Love is black

I can’t believe it has been three weeks since I last blogged.

I am 25, the countdown has been and gone and I am still as messy, indecisive and crazy as I was before, now I have an SLR camera to capture my moments of madness.

My family came for my birthday, it was fantastic. We stayed in the hotel next to Lyon’s version of Hyde Park, Parc de la Tete d’or may trump London’s as it has giraffes and you can go rowing. The apartment had two balconies that couldn’t really be enjoyed due to the snow that would not cease for prayer or cursing. A bedroom assigned to the parents far away from the living room we kids shared meant a pleasant nights sleep away from the harmonious snoring of the parental symphony.

Sitting in the sauna my sister told me of her good news, I couldn’t sit still and every time I looked at her I smiled…prayers do come true.

Friday, the day before the big day we marched around the streets of Lyon and even visited the famous Fouviere. Within minutes of stepping off the airport shuttle bus we all started winding each other up, it was funny though, I missed it!


Dinner at L’est (some big wigs restaurant). I decided to go to eat the night before my birthday and keep the actual day simple, plans can go awry and I didn’t want stress myself. The food was lovely and I got a special song for my birthday. We all had a good time although the family was rather tired from waking up for the Easyjet flight at 4am but you gotta do what you gotta do huh!

My brother and I parted ways with the other three to party the night away…I was overdressed and I knew it, I normally am but it’s my birthday and I’ll overdress if I want to. There was an awkward mix of characters but everyone got along, from the Italian guy my Polish friend and I had met the other day who sipped shots to the rugby played who turned up with a heart-shaped necklace. (I’m in trouble)


The big day arrived and I started it off early. I wanted my family to enjoy the big day as much as I planned it; nothing was going to ruin it. I suppose that is why I didn’t invite any friends for the big day; I can almost always rely on my family when I say that it is something important they are there. No friends were there to celebrate with me the week before and while maybe last year I would have been upset. This year I am glad I knew what to expect!

I received handmade cards from the children that I had taught at Annabel’s school and I almost started to cry, you don’t really know how much of an effect you have on people. I love that feeling of making other people happy. I am o happy at the moment, my energy levels are up, I am playing football and basketball with the kids, we have a new gorgeous puppy (another animal has been added to the farm).

There’s no other way to describe how I feel but content!

Love is back!

Energy

I'm ill.

I never really get ill, but my body has been weak for a while now. I don't like being sick because I am an even moanier cow than normal. My host mum thinks I have 'l'air triste', I told her that no one is happy when they are ill.

The family are going away for the weekend, host dad's birthday. There will be 14 children and 24 people in total. I opted out. I would have loved to have gone if it was only my adopted family as we are growing closer and closer. Fred reached for my hand last week and we seem to be inseparable now. He now not only lets me wipe his bum, but also his nose...I have taught him how it should really be done. Rev up all the energy that you can muster and blow with all the force that you got.

I am going to meet up with friends and try to make the most of my weekend, perhaps take a run on the treadmill and bring my energy levels back up. I am going to a brocante and may take a short trip to St Etienne, a city not far from Lyon.

My usual fall back vehicle is kaput so I now have no personal means of transport.
If my host mum thought that I was depressed before, wait til she sees me four weeks later without a car.

I can't actually remember the last time that I sang in my room,perhaps host mum is right?

All in all life is very good. I am unfortunately very unwell (probably in my head) but I am alive.

a toute a l'heure.

15 Again

I love humble people, I live with two of the most humble people that I have ever met and although they have money coming out of every orifice, it's not an issue.

What I mean by it is not an issue is that the world and their aunty does not need to know about their wealth. I got to thinking about the people I know when I bid a 'friend' a happy new year, I didn't like the response. We hadn't yet passed the first three weeks of the new year and the response that I received was as if I said it to in June.

This 'friend' has always been arrogant , I suppose one of the things that drew me to them in the first place, I kind of looked up to them, the confidence and the swagger has an allure.

As I get older many things are changing, body, image, interests, views and opinions. I am getting real comfortable with myself, and while I have never lacked self confidence perhaps I wasn't truly comfortable. If you know me and think that I didn't give a damn before, well now I really don't give much thought to what people's opinions are of me, as long as I am not hurting anyone, I will continue to do my thing.

As 25 approaches, I feel myself drawing closer to a younger me, full of spirit and sassiness, energy and drive ambition and commitment. I'm excited.

Lost and Found

I just had a really good night, I was cool calm and collected. I was with my three favourite people. I was with the kids. Never thought you'd hear me say that did you?

We just finished watching Alvin and the Chipmunks, I normally leave the kids and run off to do whatever I have to do but it was fun translating the film that I had bought Fred for Christmas from English to French.

The children loved it and so did I, it was a good movie.

It was in the middle of this film while that I realised something.

I'm sure that I'm not the only one who loves finding things once forgotten or thought lost. I find bits and bobs everywhere, my jewellery discarded in unworn coat pockets, essential mint tasting lip balm from America(only thing that works on my lips) in an unused bag. Dental floss in the back of a cupboard (I'd been looking for that for ages). But the most precious thing that I've recently claimed back is my sense of humour.

I've also found some unwanted things, hair in places......People that I don't wish to associate with. I think I've found my voice again, watch out guys, am ready to chew your ear off.

Nighty Night!

PS, the children are still hmmm how can I put this delicately....I can't, they are spoilt but I can handle them.... or lock them in their room (only joking- I only do that when their parents are not in hahahahaha)

Feeling Good

Wednesdays used to be my favourite day of the week, my day off as J doesn't work so she keeps the children busy. I fill my time with French classes in the morning and give English lessons in the afternoon, which keeps me busy up until 4pm.

I teach four kids in total and am making some nice pocket money from it. One of my students, a 10-year old boy is so enthusiastic, a real teachers pet. Every time I teach him I feel good, I'm actually doing something, hopefully having a positive influence on his future.

I can be kind of hard on my students, but I don't want their parents to feel as if they are wasting their money, by the end of the next six months, they need to be able to hold a very basic conversation.

It has been raining all day, but I have been in an incredibly good mood, I think that things can only get better. Maybe it's because my pockets are a bit heavier now, or maybe I just walked past a mirror and caught my reflection (some of you will get it).

I may be going to the cinema today, if I get to borrow the car. I don't mind seeing a film by myself, there's a first time for everything right. My friends are starting to fear for my wellbeing due to my latest blogs but, what did we all expect? Of course there are times that I will be down, I am away from all that I know for 10 months, I'm going to get down.

The clouds have parted and as the rays of sunlight pierce through my window, I smile and think bring it on.